Meh, my life sucks too
Jacob, my situation isn't quite as bad as yours just yet, however I relate to you in a similar matter.
Let's just say all that I have had, and all that I loved, my life, was basically taken from me.
And as of a next month, I have no idea if I'll be living out of a cardboard box on the streets of LA, looking for cans to recycle so I can buy a 99cent burger for my meal of the day.
I seriously have like nothing left, nothing to look forward to, and no idea what will happen when it comes time to pay rent. My is unemployed, and my mom just got laid off from her job, which barely covered rent. we have like no food, and are trying to sell everything we have just to pay one more month of rent. Hopefully we'll get enough by the deadline. My job isn't giving me shit hours right now, no matter how badly I keep asking to work.
I'd rather not talk about the whole story behind things, as I'm highly disappointed, discouraged, and alone, and it's quite painful to talk or think about, and it's a much longer story, that involves details much more complicated than in this post.
For those who care, and I feel comfortable talking to, PM me for more information if you like, though I'd rather things didn't get public.
All I can think is "why" but that is completely unexplainable, and cannot be answered.
All I had, all I was close to having, all I was looking forward to, everything I loved, my future, my life, has been taken from me, and most likely, cannot be replaced. The things, and people that I was so close to, is now a vast memory, my dreams in life, that I was SO CLOSE to obtaining, is now practically impossible without a miracle.
Lol, don't even get me started on my love life, it's much too painful to talk about that part of the story.
Basically, she's gone as well. Car accident, end of story.
[edits] note, actually, she left me first, but we were still great friends, but a few days ago, got tboned coming out of an intersection.[/edit]
Sorry to those who I let down, to those I disappointed, I have failed you, as well as myself. Note, that this is not a result of something I did, it just happened. It's much more devastating to me, than anyone else in my family.
I guess I've just gotten used to the fact of being a failure. And now, my life has turned into one's nightmare.
Failure describes my life right now. That's all I am. That's all people will see in me from now on, is that I'm a failure.
Heck, even now as I'm writing this post, I'm hearing more bad news.
All I can think of, is that I fail at life. Sure I might have had a few minor unimportant successes here and there, but ultimately, I am the definition of failure.
This is all only a tiny part of the whole story, and I'm not willing to talk about the rest of it.
I have no life, no future, and soon all my material things, will be stripped away as well.
Even more, my cousin that I was closer to, than even my own brother, was hit as a pedestrian, by a semi truck. While picking up pieces of a shredded tire off the freeway so people wouldn't get in an accident.
My latest piece of art:
The art is not in the blank page, it is in the title, which should spark a thought in your mind.
What you see, will reflect something in your heart, whether it has meaning, or not.
It could relate to my life, or your own, or someone you haven't even met.
For those who have it pretty rough, It could relate to emptiness, loneliness, nothing.
To those that have it made, you could relate to everything to it, in that there's nothing left one needs to acquire, that you have everything that you need, that you're content, etc.
It reveals your outlook.
What you see in it, is what you determine.
It cannot even describe my thoughts, or my emotions.
I have left this post incomplete, as to what I was planning to write, as I couldn't bear it to think about even the vastly minor additions compared to the major problems that I am facing.
For those who care even the slightest bit, farewell, until the next time.
G'bye.
also another friend of mine will help us paying and live with us. ^_^
O_O noone i know does! O_O